Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Letting Go

Letting Go Takes Love

To let go does not mean to stop caring,
it means I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off,
it's the realization I can't control another.
To let go is not to enable,
but allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means
the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another,
it's to make the most of myself.
To let go is not to care for,
but to care about.
To let go is not to fix,
but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge,
but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes,
but to allow others to affect their destinies.
To let go is not to be protective,
it's to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny,
but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold or argue,
but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To let go is not to criticize or regulate anybody,
but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and love more
 Remember: The time to love is short

------ author unknown

Posted by Clarence at 1:05 AM

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

troubled

Worked for the Singtel Christmas fair with Richard, Alex, Kenny and Jason. The working hours were crazy but all went well. Started work on fri 0000hrs and went home only on sat 0330 hours, then had to reach the exhibition hall again at 0800hrs before ending at 1230 hours and coming for the last day at 0900hours. It was a rather interesting and fun experience as we get to see how an empty exhibition was set up in like 24 hours. Also, I got to know who are the ones you can trust for ensuring that the job gets done and how one reacts when one has insufficient sleep. The welfare was good too, all food and drinks were provided, hell I think I had 5 meals a day when I normally have 2 a day lahz... Sure as hell hoped I didnt put on weight, but I think I did. To conclude, I would not mind working on another job like this again!

Surprise for Clara's Birthday

Date: 12 Nov
Venue: Siloso Beach
Time: Undetermined

Went out early alone to do last minute shopping for Clara's present as there simply was not enough time to buy her present other than the M2 card that we got from Jian Hua. Headed down to Bugis as I though we would be able to get the Ariel Helium Balloon for her, but it was a futile attempt since the shops there apparently didnt sell it. Anyway, since time was still rather early, I walked around the whole of Parco searching for a suitable present but that elusive present seemed to be non-existent. The original plan was to get her some Ariel products from Watsons, however, it appeared that all the Ariel products had been sold out. Decided to try my luck at the Watsons store at Bugis, and wala, they were still selling the Ariel product, abeit there having like only a few bottles on the shelf. So, after some discussion with Pei yu, we decided to get the bottle straight away in addition to the other presents that we had Pei yu prepare.

Next, I headed down to Carrefour at PS to get the candles as I simply could not find any at the Cold Storage at Parco. After getting all the stuff that was required that night, I headed down to Vivocity to wait for Pei yu and Wini. At around 2100, we were already on our way to Sentosa. Pei yu left early to pick Clara up, while wini and I went about preparing the candles for a mini surprise for Clara. John came by later to help out. However, we ran into a few problems. Firstly, the wind was rather strong and it kept blowing out the candles. Secondly, the lighter that wini brought was running out of both gas and fuel (is that the correct term for it?). Thirdly, we tend to burn ourselves with the lighter when we tried to light the candles. And lastly, it looked like it was going to rain any moment. At first, we tried setting up the candles, but due to the strong wind and the slight drizzle, we decided to shift from Emrald Pavillion to Sapphire Pavillion. Had to collobrate with John to put up a convicing story as Clara knew that John would be meeting me to come to Sentosa, as I had lied to her that I would be late. So, when she called, I was kinda caught by surprise as I thought she knew I would be "late", and I was kinda like by the sea, so the sound of the waves were pretty obvious I should say. But thankfully, she thought it was the sounds of cars.

Anyway, after much sweat and running about, we finally got the candles burning just in time for her arrival. At first, when Pei yu and Zam were bringing her to the pavillion, Clara didnt realise us for who we were, she simply just thought that there was someone at the pavillion oready and that they had to look for another empty spot. It was only upon closer inspection, then she realised it was us. You should have seen the look on her face haha totally surprised lahz!!






The candles look damn nice lahz!!! haha and the words are quite clear!! Haha proud of the job!!



The Nutella Cake!!
They look like they are doing an advertisment for Pizza Hut. Maybe I should just submit the photo to Pizza Hut, haha Free advertisment lehz!!!
Clara with her Ariel Bottle and her present
After the tedious task of unwrapping all the newspapers, we present the M2 card and the Ariel Bottle!
A handmade card designed by our dear Pei yu. Its simple and nice!

Trying to read the message by candle light

Collage of photos once again designed by our dear Pei yuJohn and Nizam both trying to imitate the "Shanks eyes" ( For those who are clueless about what the term means, its the T-rex eyes from the land before time show. Apparently, I always tend to have that pair of eyes when I am sleepy or in a foul mood. And I have heard that I look kinda fierce and scary.... Man i wonder how I look like in a photo... )Comparing the number of mosquito bites that night

I guess I have been feeling really low these few days and nothing seems to be able to bring me out of this downtrodden stupor. I dunno, it seems like the whole world is painted in simply black and white and all the colours have simply vanished. That familiar feeling of lonliness has returned to haunt me again..

People that I have been close to once, are drifting away...
People who used to talk to me have shrinken away...

I wonder if its because of my actions or rather its my personality? Maybe deep down in their hearts,I am just simply detestable.. One question has been plaguing me for a long time, appearing constantly in dreams that seem to haunt me night after night relentlessly.

What is wrong with me?
What are the qualities that I am lacking?
Why do I have the feeling that you are avoiding me discreetly? (I hope I am imagineing this but...)

Thats all I need to know and want to know... Maybe, just maybe that will be the solution to the plague of troubling thoughts that have been haunting me...

Posted by Clarence at 6:36 AM

Monday, November 10, 2008

Ubin race and Sarah's 21st!

Whew!!! Finally all the exams are over and there is finally time to catch up on much needed sleep. The past few weeks had simply just been crazy, what with frentic revision and overnight studies with Wini and Pei yu, study sessions with Jason. Anyway, though the papers were rather difficult, I believe that all of us will scrap through it.

Went down for a last session of training, or rather warm-up, on friday 07/10/08 before the much anticipated, or rather dreaded, Round Ubin Marathon race on 09/10/08. Only Pei yu, Nizam, Kenneth, Jason and I were there to attend the training. We were to row 2 triangles around at the Kallang Basin. Although it was only like at most 8 click, I was like struggling to finish the 2 triangles. Dunno whether isst becuz I was too out of practise or I was just not that strong mentally to finish the rest of the rounds before fatigue overtook the body. As usual the rest of them were like damn fast lahz, haha but one funny thing happened during the training. While sprinting off at the start of the round, I collided with Nizam's canoe and caused him to turn a full 360 degrees. Didnt expect the effect to be so great and no it was unintentional, but well well at least he knows what to expect during the marathon haha.

Headed down to Cafe Oliv for Sarah's 21st birthday celebration after the training.
Those who were present at her Birthday Celebration!!





The food looks and tastes good!
The Birthday gal and the 2 pretty ladies





Designing the Guest book.
Haha I still can clearly remember what Jason wrote. "Thanks for instilling warmth in me... " Waha super funny lah can? hahaha
With our own personalised cards!!

Pre-race preparations




The day of the Round Ubin Race. Everyone was kinda nervous and high strung about the competition on that day as for most of us, it was the first competition that we were taking part in. It was quite an experience I should say. The forming up at the start line was chaotic as everyone struggled to find a good starting point while attempting to mantain the line between the 2 starting buoys. Well, the race was kinda fun though a bit tiring. Partnered with vincent for the T2 senior men's category and sadly we came in last due to a capsize.. Well guess will have to try harder the next time round. But the rest did well I should say. All of us came in top 8 positions! Jun Sheng clinched the 3rd place, Nizam the 5th and Lex the 6th place for the T1 Senior Men's Category. Pei yu and Jason clinched the 7th place out of 9 teams which can be said to be excellent, given that training was insufficient and that they were inexperienced too.






Went down to V8 cafe at Bugis Parco for dinner after the race for a mini celebration.Next, we all went to participate in the Subaru Challenge. Guess who was the last man or woman standing?


Okie, was just kidding. The actual Subaru Challenge participant is none other than Sarah. However, she had to withdraw from the competition due to her not feeling well. Try harder next time!! Haha maybe we can all join together next year

Posted by Clarence at 9:10 AM